a day, after 4 years...

So, after 4 years finally 29th Feb has arrived. As I recollect, 4 years ago... in 2004 during this time I was busy in my engineering college with the annual fest, INCIDENT - 2004. I was the convenor of the food-committee and I still recollect how all the 4th year ppl were happy with my work. All those are now just sweet memories. 4 years just flew through the window. Time and Tide seriously dont wait for anyone.

What is Democracy ?

Courtesy : Metallica [One]

The cerebrum has suffered massive and irreparable damage
You can never know what has happened to him
If I have not been sure of this, I would not have permitted him to live
Where am I?
Father
What happened?
I need help
What is democracy?
What is democracy?
It got something to do with young men killing each other, Arthur
When it’s comes my turn, will you want me to go?
For democracy, any man would give his only begotten son

It is impossible for any severed individual to experience pain
Pleasure
Memory
Dreams or thought of any kind
This young man will be as unfeeling
As unthinking as the dead
Until the day he joins them

I don’t know weather I’m alive or dreaming or dead or remembering
How can you tell what’s a dream and what’s real
When you can’t even tell when you’re awake and when you’re asleep

Where am I?

I can’t remember anything
Can't tell if this is true or dream
Deep down inside I feel to scream
This terrible silence stops with me

Now that the war is through with me
I'm waking up, I cannot see
That there's not much left of me
Nothing is real but pain now

Hold my breath as I wish for death
Oh please God, wake me

They kept my head and chopped off everything
Oh god, please make them hear me
They won’t listen, they won’t hear me
They got to wake me up I’ll be like this for years
Hear me

Back in the womb it's much too real
In pumps life that I must feel
But can't look forward to reveal
Look to the time when I'll live

Fed through the tube that sticks in me
Just like a wartime novelty
Tied to machines that make me be
Cut this life off from me

Hold my breath as I wish for death
Oh please God, wake me

It’s like a piece of me that keeps on living
It won’t always be like this, will it?

I can’t live like this!
I-I can’t!
Please no
I can’t! I can’t!
Help me, help me, help me!
Mother where are ya?
Mommy, mother, I’m having a nightmare and I can’t wake up

Now the world is gone I'm just one
Oh God help me

Hold my breath as I wish for death
Oh please God, help me

Me lying here like, like some freak in a carnival show
Here is the armless
Legless
Wonder of the twentieth century

Death has a dignity of its own
Father!
I need help
I’m in terrible trouble and I need help
Don’t you remember when you were little?
How and you and Bill Harper use to string a wire between the two houses
So you could telegraph to each other
You’ll remember the Morse code

Darkness
Imprisoning me
All that I see
Absolute horror
I cannot live
I cannot die
Trapped in myself
Body my holding cell

It’s Morse code
For what?
S.O.S.
Help

Landmine
Has taken my sight
Taken my speech
Taken my hearing
Taken my arms
Taken my legs
Taken my soul
Left me with life in Hell

What’s he saying?
Said kill me
Over and over again
Kill me
Oh god, please make them hear me
Don’t you have any message for him Arthur?
He’s the product of your profession
Not mine

Kill me
I’m asking you to kill me

Thank you

Save me please
Father

Each man faces death by himself
Alone
Good-bye father

Inside me I’m screaming nobody pays any attention
If I had arms, I could kill myself
If I had legs, I could run away
If I had a voice, I could talk and be some kind of company for myself
How do I know they’ll kill me?
I could yell for help, but nobody’d help me
I just got to do some kind of, see how I can go on like this

S.O.S. help me
S.O.S. help me

Keep the home fires burning
While our hearts are yearning

A Concert of a Lifetime !!!

10 years ago, when I started getting the taste of Rock & Metal, I never imagined that someday somewhere I would see IRON MAIDEN performing LIVE!!! The legends, ruling the scene of Metal since late 70s are truly the God for the music lovers. But patience always pays. I finally got the opportunity to see them perform Live in Mumbai on the evening of 1st February. 2008. The concert started with a local band from Mumbai, followed by performance by Lauren Harris (daughter of Iron Maiden bassist Steve Harris). She was simply superb. The concert was finally opened by the great Indian Rock Band - Parikrama. Parikrama performed most of their originals including the classic "But It Rained". Then come the Legends. The Somewhere Back in Time, World Tour 2008 had its 1st concert in India. I was spell bound to see Bruce just in front of my eyes. A guy 60+ in age, so energetic ... it was simply mind blowing. They performed all those world hits like "Fear of the Dark", "Aces High", "Wasted Years", "Powerslave", "2 Minutes to Midnight","Clairvoyant", "Can I Play With Madness", "The Troopers", "Hallowed Be Thy Name" etc etc . The crowd was simply amazing. I suppose around 15K people turned up for the show. It was my 1st visit to an International Band's performance, and a memorable one for the lifetime. Hats Off to Maidens !!!!

Somewhere Back In Time ...

Iron Maiden - World Tour 2008

1st Feb '08 - Mumbai (India)
waiting eagerly...

Stay Hungry, Stay Foolish

Stanford Report, June 14, 2005

This is the text of the Commencement address by Steve Jobs, CEO of Apple Computer and of Pixar Animation Studios, delivered on June 12, 2005.

I am honored to be with you today at your commencement from one of the finest universities in the world. I never graduated from college. Truth be told, this is the closest I've ever gotten to a college graduation. Today I want to tell you three stories from my life. That's it. No big deal. Just three stories.

The first story is about connecting the dots.

I dropped out of Reed College after the first 6 months, but then stayed around as a drop-in for another 18 months or so before I really quit. So why did I drop out?

It started before I was born. My biological mother was a young, unwed college graduate student, and she decided to put me up for adoption. She felt very strongly that I should be adopted by college graduates, so everything was all set for me to be adopted at birth by a lawyer and his wife. Except that when I popped out they decided at the last minute that they really wanted a girl. So my parents, who were on a waiting list, got a call in the middle of the night asking: "We have an unexpected baby boy; do you want him?" They said: "Of course." My biological mother later found out that my mother had never graduated from college and that my father had never graduated from high school. She refused to sign the final adoption papers. She only relented a few months later when my parents promised that I would someday go to college.

And 17 years later I did go to college. But I naively chose a college that was almost as expensive as Stanford, and all of my working-class parents' savings were being spent on my college tuition. After six months, I couldn't see the value in it. I had no idea what I wanted to do with my life and no idea how college was going to help me figure it out. And here I was spending all of the money my parents had saved their entire life. So I decided to drop out and trust that it would all work out OK. It was pretty scary at the time, but looking back it was one of the best decisions I ever made. The minute I dropped out I could stop taking the required classes that didn't interest me, and begin dropping in on the ones that looked interesting.

It wasn't all romantic. I didn't have a dorm room, so I slept on the floor in friends' rooms, I returned coke bottles for the 5¢ deposits to buy food with, and I would walk the 7 miles across town every Sunday night to get one good meal a week at the Hare Krishna temple. I loved it. And much of what I stumbled into by following my curiosity and intuition turned out to be priceless later on. Let me give you one example:

Reed College at that time offered perhaps the best calligraphy instruction in the country. Throughout the campus every poster, every label on every drawer, was beautifully hand calligraphed. Because I had dropped out and didn't have to take the normal classes, I decided to take a calligraphy class to learn how to do this. I learned about serif and san serif typefaces, about varying the amount of space between different letter combinations, about what makes great typography great. It was beautiful, historical, artistically subtle in a way that science can't capture, and I found it fascinating.

None of this had even a hope of any practical application in my life. But ten years later, when we were designing the first Macintosh computer, it all came back to me. And we designed it all into the Mac. It was the first computer with beautiful typography. If I had never dropped in on that single course in college, the Mac would have never had multiple typefaces or proportionally spaced fonts. And since Windows just copied the Mac, its likely that no personal computer would have them. If I had never dropped out, I would have never dropped in on this calligraphy class, and personal computers might not have the wonderful typography that they do. Of course it was impossible to connect the dots looking forward when I was in college. But it was very, very clear looking backwards ten years later.

Again, you can't connect the dots looking forward; you can only connect them looking backwards. So you have to trust that the dots will somehow connect in your future. You have to trust in something — your gut, destiny, life, karma, whatever. This approach has never let me down, and it has made all the difference in my life.

My second story is about love and loss.

I was lucky — I found what I loved to do early in life. Woz and I started Apple in my parents garage when I was 20. We worked hard, and in 10 years Apple had grown from just the two of us in a garage into a $2 billion company with over 4000 employees. We had just released our finest creation — the Macintosh — a year earlier, and I had just turned 30. And then I got fired. How can you get fired from a company you started? Well, as Apple grew we hired someone who I thought was very talented to run the company with me, and for the first year or so things went well. But then our visions of the future began to diverge and eventually we had a falling out. When we did, our Board of Directors sided with him. So at 30 I was out. And very publicly out. What had been the focus of my entire adult life was gone, and it was devastating.

I really didn't know what to do for a few months. I felt that I had let the previous generation of entrepreneurs down - that I had dropped the baton as it was being passed to me. I met with David Packard and Bob Noyce and tried to apologize for screwing up so badly. I was a very public failure, and I even thought about running away from the valley. But something slowly began to dawn on me — I still loved what I did. The turn of events at Apple had not changed that one bit. I had been rejected, but I was still in love. And so I decided to start over.

I didn't see it then, but it turned out that getting fired from Apple was the best thing that could have ever happened to me. The heaviness of being successful was replaced by the lightness of being a beginner again, less sure about everything. It freed me to enter one of the most creative periods of my life.

During the next five years, I started a company named NeXT, another company named Pixar, and fell in love with an amazing woman who would become my wife. Pixar went on to create the worlds first computer animated feature film, Toy Story, and is now the most successful animation studio in the world. In a remarkable turn of events, Apple bought NeXT, I returned to Apple, and the technology we developed at NeXT is at the heart of Apple's current renaissance. And Laurene and I have a wonderful family together.

I'm pretty sure none of this would have happened if I hadn't been fired from Apple. It was awful tasting medicine, but I guess the patient needed it. Sometimes life hits you in the head with a brick. Don't lose faith. I'm convinced that the only thing that kept me going was that I loved what I did. You've got to find what you love. And that is as true for your work as it is for your lovers. Your work is going to fill a large part of your life, and the only way to be truly satisfied is to do what you believe is great work. And the only way to do great work is to love what you do. If you haven't found it yet, keep looking. Don't settle. As with all matters of the heart, you'll know when you find it. And, like any great relationship, it just gets better and better as the years roll on. So keep looking until you find it. Don't settle.

My third story is about death.

When I was 17, I read a quote that went something like: "If you live each day as if it was your last, someday you'll most certainly be right." It made an impression on me, and since then, for the past 33 years, I have looked in the mirror every morning and asked myself: "If today were the last day of my life, would I want to do what I am about to do today?" And whenever the answer has been "No" for too many days in a row, I know I need to change something.

Remembering that I'll be dead soon is the most important tool I've ever encountered to help me make the big choices in life. Because almost everything — all external expectations, all pride, all fear of embarrassment or failure - these things just fall away in the face of death, leaving only what is truly important. Remembering that you are going to die is the best way I know to avoid the trap of thinking you have something to lose. You are already naked. There is no reason not to follow your heart.

About a year ago I was diagnosed with cancer. I had a scan at 7:30 in the morning, and it clearly showed a tumor on my pancreas. I didn't even know what a pancreas was. The doctors told me this was almost certainly a type of cancer that is incurable, and that I should expect to live no longer than three to six months. My doctor advised me to go home and get my affairs in order, which is doctor's code for prepare to die. It means to try to tell your kids everything you thought you'd have the next 10 years to tell them in just a few months. It means to make sure everything is buttoned up so that it will be as easy as possible for your family. It means to say your goodbyes.

I lived with that diagnosis all day. Later that evening I had a biopsy, where they stuck an endoscope down my throat, through my stomach and into my intestines, put a needle into my pancreas and got a few cells from the tumor. I was sedated, but my wife, who was there, told me that when they viewed the cells under a microscope the doctors started crying because it turned out to be a very rare form of pancreatic cancer that is curable with surgery. I had the surgery and I'm fine now.

This was the closest I've been to facing death, and I hope its the closest I get for a few more decades. Having lived through it, I can now say this to you with a bit more certainty than when death was a useful but purely intellectual concept:

No one wants to die. Even people who want to go to heaven don't want to die to get there. And yet death is the destination we all share. No one has ever escaped it. And that is as it should be, because Death is very likely the single best invention of Life. It is Life's change agent. It clears out the old to make way for the new. Right now the new is you, but someday not too long from now, you will gradually become the old and be cleared away. Sorry to be so dramatic, but it is quite true.

Your time is limited, so don't waste it living someone else's life. Don't be trapped by dogma — which is living with the results of other people's thinking. Don't let the noise of others' opinions drown out your own inner voice. And most important, have the courage to follow your heart and intuition. They somehow already know what you truly want to become. Everything else is secondary.

When I was young, there was an amazing publication called The Whole Earth Catalog, which was one of the bibles of my generation. It was created by a fellow named Stewart Brand not far from here in Menlo Park, and he brought it to life with his poetic touch. This was in the late 1960's, before personal computers and desktop publishing, so it was all made with typewriters, scissors, and polaroid cameras. It was sort of like Google in paperback form, 35 years before Google came along: it was idealistic, and overflowing with neat tools and great notions.

Stewart and his team put out several issues of The Whole Earth Catalog, and then when it had run its course, they put out a final issue. It was the mid-1970s, and I was your age. On the back cover of their final issue was a photograph of an early morning country road, the kind you might find yourself hitchhiking on if you were so adventurous. Beneath it were the words: "Stay Hungry. Stay Foolish." It was their farewell message as they signed off. Stay Hungry. Stay Foolish. And I have always wished that for myself. And now, as you graduate to begin anew, I wish that for you.

Stay Hungry. Stay Foolish.

Thank you all very much.

Taare Zameen Par...

Muhaley Ki Raunak, Galiyan Hain Jaise
Khilney Ki Zid Par, Kaliyan Hain Jaise

!!! Kho Na Jaaye Ye Taare Zameen Par !!!

1st post of the Year - 2008

New year's eve celebration was a cool one. Not much noise, just chillax type of dinner with some of the best buddies.Hoping to have a similar chill type year ahead. Kerala trip was more than refreshing, with new energy, aspirations and determination to make 2008 better than 2007. 2007 will be remembered as one of the worst year in my life. A year full of just craps. But, gone is gone. Hope everything will be fine this year ...

Dude's Day out ....

Yesterday, we went to Ponmudi, a place 80Km away from Trivandrum and is at the mountain top of Western Ghat. We took food along with us and so it was more a picnic for us. The drive to the table top was awesome. 22 Hair-Pin Curves and 60 degree elevation of the roads will make anyone get scared for the first time. It took around 2 hrs. to reach there and the view from there was too good. It was green all around and was a retreat for the eyes. One can actually feel the pressure difference and the cool wind added to the serenity of the place. It was a great feeling being there. Took a lot of pictures, had our lunch there. On the way back we visited the house of one of my friend's relative. He was an old person of 90 years, but age was not a limiting factor for him. He was running a charity organization for the spastic children, a totally nonprofit institution. I was amazed to see the complex of his institution and his house with hundreds of different varieties of plants. Looking at all those, it made me believe that determination is the root of all great deeds. Finally, towards the evening we returned home. A day full of fun and great feelings.

Pune to Trivandrum

A vacation is like love - anticipated with pleasure, experienced with discomfort, and remembered with nostalgia. ~Anonymous

When it feels like that we can no longer take what we've been taking, we decide to take a vacation. With crappy stuffs going all around and getting bored with all the daily mechanical life, myself and my friend decided to go for a vacation. But a vacation will be incomplete if it is not crazy. So we made up our mind to drive down from Pune to Trivandrum, a distance of around 1500 Kms. With all necessary stuffs packed up, we started at around 11PM of 19th Dec. 2007 from Pune. The road was known to us and Kerala being the native place of my friend, there was no problem finding the correct routes. We reached Mangalore the next day around 1PM. Mangalore being the place where I spent 4 yrs. of my engineering, we dropped by my college. It was a surprise to see the changed scene of the college. There was developments all around, with newer hostels, new department buildings. I met the HOD of computer engineering. It was a real pleasure. Then we had our lunch in the most favorite resturent of my college days. Then we again headed for the next part of our journey. But 24 hrs. of continous driving was getting just too much for both of us. So we dropped by Calicut in a hotel for the night and then started for Trivandrum the next day again. Finally, by afternoon we reached our destination. Except for 2 small incidents, the whole journey was safe and sound. We travelled 1500 Kms by car, burnt 100 litres of petrol in 1.5 days; reaching Trivandrun by afternoon of 21st Dec. 2007. It will be one of the memorable trip for both me and my friend. Now enjoying nice homely food in my friend's place. A lot of plans in store for the next few days.

Lead me to the Rock that is higher than I

Found this verse to be extremely soothing and beautiful. Inspired by Psalm 61:2.

When things go wrong as they sometimes do,

Lead me to the Rock that is higher than I.

When the lonely times come and I feel I just can’t make it through,
Lead me to the Rock that is higher than I.

When my sunny days are darkened by my grief,
Lead me to the Rock that is higher than I.

When my body is aching and I can’t find any relief,
Lead me to the Rock that is higher than I.

When my family is going through heart ache and pain,
Lead me to the Rock that is higher than I.

When no one will stand with me, with Christ I will remain,
For, Jesus is that Rock that is higher than I.

Jesus, you are my Rock, my Deliverer, my Fortress, my Strength,
my Protector, my Supply, my Plan, my Future, my Inspiration,
and You have become my Salvation.
Jesus, I am forever yours.

Privileged to be younger...

Sometimes I feel that I was lucky to be born as a younger sibling to my elder brother. Throughout my life till now, I learnt a lot from his life. In school, when he topped the board exam, it gave me motivation to do the same. And, I did. His achievements were my guiding star and his mistakes were my "don't". And the life went by till today, with that notion. Materialistically, I got a lot from him . Recently, when he came from the States for vacation, he got a lot of stuffs for me, and I don't even have words to thank him. The only thing I can say is, I am really privileged to be my elder bro's younger brother.

a month so cool ....

The month of October was quite good for me. My parents were with me, for which I enjoyed every bit of the good food, the family talks, shopping, head-massage. I felt more responsible for the homely chores, be it buying vegetables for meals or just to take parents out. I almost bid farewell to my chaos full life in this month. I maintained a strict 9AM to 6PM time table during the weekdays. But as the days for parents' return journey is approaching, I am feeling a bit suffocated as I will be back to my old solitary days. Although I enjoy loneliness but there is something special about living with parents. Few more days to go and I will be back to bedlam.

The Power of NOW !!!

Reflection of Quarter Life Crisis or harmful effects of some One Sided Love/Affection or personal problems or just a normal age related problem... I don't know. But, one thing is really true to me. I AM CONFUSED. I have repeatedly written about it in my blogs with the hope that the Pandora's Box will be opened someday and I will get a way through, but all in vain. I could never really find an answer. Recently, one of my friends advised me to try spirituality. So, with an impulse I bought the book The Power of Now by Eckhart Tolle. Till now just read the forward and preface of the book, and found it very encouraging. The book teaches how to attain inner peace and spiritual enlightenment just with the power of our mind, without really changing the external factors which are usually the root causes of the psychological pain most of us suffer from. But this can be done only if we leave our analytical mind and its false created self, the ego, behind. The journey is challenging and difficult. One para from the book states like this...

"I woke up in the early hours with a feeling of absolute dread. I had woken up with such a feeling many times before, but this time it was more intense than it had ever been. The silence of the night, the vague outlines of the furniture in the dark room, the distant noise of a passing train - everything felt so alien, so hostile, and so utterly meaningless that it created in me a deep loathing of the world. The most loathsome thing of all, however, was my own existence. What was the point in continuing to live with this burden of misery? Why carry on with this continuous struggle? I could feel that a deep longing for annihilation, for nonexistence, was now becoming much stronger than the instinctive desire to continue to live.
......
I cannot live with myself any longer." This was the thought that kept repeating itself in my mind. Then suddenly I became aware of what a peculiar thought it was. `Am I one or two? If I cannot live with myself, there must be two of me: the `I' and the `self' that `I' cannot live with." "Maybe," I thought, "only one of them is real."

Hence I get the silver lining. Lemme see, what in store for me...

Madhushala (The Tavern)

An English Translation of the golden classic Madhushaala by Hariwansh Rai Bachhan

Seeking wine, the drinker leaves home for the tavern.
Perplexed, he asks, "Which path will take me there?"
People show him different ways, but this is what I have to say,
"Pick a path and keep walking. You will find the tavern."

Hark! The wine gurgles and splashes as it falls from the goblet.
Hark! It sounds like the tinkling of bells on the feet of an intoxicated girl.
We have reached there, a few steps are we from the tavern,
Hark! Hear the laughter of the drinkers, as the fragrance of the tavern wafts through the air.

Call it not lava, though it flows red, like a tongue of flame.
Call it not the blistered heart, for it is only foaming wine.
Lost memories serve the wine, that intoxicates with pain.
If you find happiness in suffering, come to my tavern.

He who has burnt all scriptures with his inner fire,
Has broken temples, mosques and churches with carefree abandon,
And has cut the nooses of pandits, mullahs and priests ---
Only he is welcome in my tavern.

Alas, he that with eager lips, has not kissed this wine,
Alas, he that trembling with joy, has not touched a brimming goblet,
He that has not drawn close the coy wine-maiden by her hand,
Has wasted this honey-filled tavern of Life.

My beloved wine-maiden seems a priest; her wine as pure as the Ganga's waters.
With unbroken pace, she rotates the rosary of wine glasses.
"Drink more! Drink more!" she intones in prayer.
I am Shiva incarnate and this tavern is my temple.

Only once every year, the fires of Holi are lit.
Only once is the game played and are garlands of lamps lit.
But, O, those who are lost in the world, come and see the tavern any day,
The tavern celebrates a Holi, every morning and a Diwali every night.

Whatever the taste on my lips, it tastes like wine.
Whatever the vessel in my hands, it feels like a goblet.
Every face dissolves into the features of my wine-maiden,
And whatever be in front of my eyes, they fill only with visions of the tavern.

Ah, Beautiful, your lovely face is like a crystal bowl,
Whose precious gem is your beauty, sparkling like sweet, intoxicating wine.
I am the wine-maiden and I am the guest.
Where sit we together, there indeed is the tavern.

A mere two days she served me but the young maiden is sulking now.
She fills my goblet and passes it curtly to me.
Her coquetry and charms are lost arts;
All the tavern wishes now is to fulfil its obligations.

Life is short. How much love can I give and how much can I drink?
They say, "He departs," at the very moment that he is born.
While he is being welcomed, I have seen his farewell being prepared.
They started closing the shutters of the tavern, as soon as they were raised.

O maiden! Which burning heart has been pacified by drinking?
Every drinker repeats only one chant, "More! More!"
Seeking satisfaction, he leaves behind so many desires.
Of how many such hopes is this tavern a tomb?

Yama will come as the wine-maiden and bring his black wine,
Drink, and know no more consciousness, O carefree one.
This is the ultimate trance, the ultimate wine-maiden and the ultimate goblet.
O traveller, drink judiciously, for you will never find the tavern again.

Each day, O companion, spills more wine from my life.
Each day, O fortunate one, this goblet, my body, is burnt.
Each day, O lovely woman, this wine-maiden, my youth, distances itself from me.
Each day, O beauty, this tavern, my Life, is drying up.

When from the earthen jar of my body, the wine of life is emptied,
When the final wine-maiden comes with her bowl of poison,
When my hand forgets the touch of the goblet, and my lips the taste of wine,
Whisper in my ears, "the wine, the goblet, the tavern!"

Touch not my lips with tulasi, but with the goblet, when I die.
Touch not my tongue with the Ganga's waters, but with wine, when I die.
When you bear my corpse, pallbearers, remember this!
Call not the name of God, but call to the truth that is the tavern.

Weep over my corpse, if you can weep tears of wine.
Sigh dejectedly for me, if you are intoxicated and carefree.
Bear me on your shoulders, if you stumble drunkenly along.
Cremate me on that land, where there once was a tavern.

Pour on my ashes, not ghee, but wine.
Tie to a vine of grapes, not a waterpot, but a wine-goblet.
And when, my darling, you must call guests for the ritual feast,
Do this - call those who will drink and have the tavern opened for them.

If anyone asks my name, say it was, "The Drunkard".
My work? I drank and passed the goblet to everyone.
O Beloved, if they ask my caste, say only that I was mad.
Say my religion worshipped goblets and then chant with your rosary, "The tavern, the tavern!"

O son, raise not water at my final rites, but wine in your palms.
And sit somewhere, having filled the Ganga with wine.
If you can wet the earth somewhere, my soul will be satisfied.
Offer your libations to your ancestral spirits by reading repeatedly, "The tavern, the tavern."

********************************************************************************

Madhushaala

I SALUTE Hariwansh Rai Bachhan WHO HAS RICHEN THE INDIAN LITERATURE THROUGH THIS CLASSIC....

madira meiN jaane ko ghar se chaltaa hai peenewaala
kis path se jaaooN asmanjas meiN hai wo bhola bhaala
alag alag pathu batalaathi sab paR maiN ye bataata hooN
raah pakaD tu ek chalaa-chal paa jaayega madhushaala

sun kal-kal chal-chal madhu-ghaT se girti pyalOn meiN haala
sun run Jhun-Jhun chal witran karti madhusa ki baala
bas aa pahunche door nahiN kuch chaar kadam aur chalna hai
chahak rahe sun peene waale mehak rahi le madhushaala

naal sura kee dhaar lapaT see keh na dena ise jwaaLa
madira hai math isko keh dena uRR ka chaala
dard nasha hai is madira ka wigat smritiyaN saaqi haiN
peeDa meiN anand jise ho aaye meri madhushaala

dharm-grandh sab jala chuki hai jiske antar kee jwaala
mandir masjid girje sab ko toD chuka jo matwaala
panDit momin paadriyoN ke fandoN ko jo kaat chuka
kar sakti hai aaj usee ka swaagat meri madhushaala

laalayeet adhRoN se jisne haaye nahiN choomi haala
harshit kampit kar se jisne haay madhu ka chooaa pyaala
haath pakaD kar lajjit saaqi ko paas nahiN jisne kheencha
wyarth sukha Daali jeewan kee usne mahdumay madhushaala

bane pujaari premi saaqi ganga jal paawan haala
rahe ferta awirat gati se madhu ke pyaaloN kee maala
aur leeye jaa aur peeye jaa isi mantr ka jaap keeye jaa
maiN shiv ki pratima ban baiThooN mandir ho ye madhushaala

ek baras meiN ek baar hee jagti holi kee jwaala
ek baar hee lagti baaji jalti deepoN kee maala
duniya waaloN kintu kisi din aa madiraalay meiN dekho
din meiN holi raat diwaali roz manaati madhushaala

adharon par ho koee bhi ras jiwha par lagti haalaa
han jag ho koee haathon mein lagta rakkha hae pyaalaa
har surat saaqi ki surat mein parivartit ho jaati
aankhon ke aage ho kuchh bhi aankhon mein hae Madhushaalaa.

sumukhi tumhara sundar mukh hi mujh ko kanchan kaa pyaalaa
chhalak rahi hai jisme maNik roop madhur maadak haalaa
maiN hi saaqi banta maiN hi peene waala banta hoon
jahan kahin mil baithe hum tum wahiN gaee ho madhushaala

do din hee madhu muJhe pilaa kar oob uthi saaqi baalaa
bhar kar ab khiska detee hai woh mere aage pyaalaa
naaz-o-adaa andaazon se ab haaye pilaanaa door hua
ab to kar detee hai kewal farz-adaaee madhushaalaa

choTe se jeewaN meiN kitna pyaar karooN peelooN haala
aane ke hee saath jagat meiN kehlaaya jaane-waala
swaagat ke hee saath wida ki hothi dekhi tayyaari
band lagi hone khulte hee meri jeewan madhushaala

saant saki ho ab taq saaqi peekar kis uRR kee jwaala
aur aur ki raTan lagaata jaata har peene-waala
kitni iKsha ek har jaaNe-waala yahaN choD jaata
kitne aRmaanoN kee bankar qaBr khaDi hai madhushaala

yam aayega saaqi bankar saath liye kaali haala
pee na hosh meiN phir aayega sura wisudh yeh matwaala
yeh antim behoshi antim saaqi antim pyaala hai
pathiK pyaar se peena isko fir na milegee madhushaala

girti jaati hai din-pratidin pRanayani pRaanoN kee haala
maGn hua jaata din-pratidin deen subhge mera tan pyaala
rooth raha hai muJhse roop si din-din yauwan ka saaqi
sookh rahi hai din-din sundari meri jeewan madhushaala

Dhalak rahee ho tan ke ghaT se sangini jab jeewanhaala
paaTr garal ka le ab antiM saaqi ho aanewaala
haath paras bhoole pyaale ka swaad sura jiWha bhoole
kaanoN meiN tum kehti rehna madhuKaNN pyaala madhushaala

mere aDharoN par ho na antiM wastu na tulsi-jal pyaala
mere JiWha par ho antiM wastu na ganga-jal haala
mere shaV ke peeche chalne-waaloN yaad ise rakhna
ram-naam hai satya na kehna kehna sachchi madhushaala

mere shaV par wah roYe ho jiske aaNsoo meiN haala
aaH bhare wah jo ho surbhit madeera peekar matwaala
de muJhko wo kaandha jinke pad-mad dag-mag hoNte ho
aur jalooN uss Thaur jahaN par kabhi rahee ho madhushaala

aur chitha par jaaye unDela paatR na ghRith ka par pyaala
GhanT bandhe angoor latha meiN madhya na jal ho par haala
praan-priye yadi SHraadH karO tum mera to aise karna
peene-waaloN ko bulwa kar khulwa dena madhushaala

naam agar pooche koi to kehna bas peene-waala
kaam garal na aur dhaalna sab ke madiroN ka pyaala
jaati priYe pooche yadi koi keh dena deewanoN kee
dharM batana pyaaloN ki le maala japna madhushaala

pitR paKsh meiN putR uThana araGYan na kar meiN par pyaala
baiTh kahiN par jaana ganga sagar meiN bharkar haala
kisi jagaH kee miTTi bheege tRipti muJhe mil jaaYegee
darpan arpan karna muJhko paDh paDh karke "madhushaala"

********************************************************************************
Lyrics : Hariwansh Rai Bachhan
Music : Jaidev
Voices : Hariwansh Rai Bachhan, Manna Dey

One Sided Love

I was feeling like writing about One Sided Love for many time now. Found some nice sentimental blogs on the same topic in the net. Really a lot many of us suffer from this. Writing some anecdotes about it...

One Sided Love is like reaching for a star, you know you'll never reach it but you still keep trying.

Many people have different views about it ...

...we have all probably been on both sides of the fence. The guy/girl that really liked you and your friends or family knew he/she was right for you but u just never felt that spark. you hung out etc etc. Its life, it happens. Its human nature... to try to make some one like and/or love you. But hey all we can do is learn from these lessons of LIFE. These lessons are real, difficult, easy and complicated at the same time.

...Love is definitely the gift and the curse. Just like most everyone else, I've been on both sides of it. Hell, I'm on both sides of it now. You can't help who you fall for or who falls for you.

Love.. How can something so damn wonderful in essence be torture too.... !

One sided love is like two parallel lines which never intersect at any point.... but we still try try and try .... its so unfortunate to fall in love with someone who doesn't love you.... I just want to be loved by him/her once even if its for a moment ...and I will try for it till I am alive !!! I know it sounds a bit childish, gross and filmy but Its true!!

One sided love isn't a nice feeling. You feel desperate for his or her love. You begin to feel he or she takes you for granted. You get back from him or her only a miserable fraction of what you give. You're constantly worried about losing him or her.
Does that sound like love to you? It sounds kind of one-sided and like a waste of time to me...

... if both sides love equals then none of the partners will really enjoy what love means...!!!

... love is never wasted, regardless of the other's participation. There is always a lesson and a next step in your own Spiritual Unfoldment. Love and learn. Note though, the difference between love and attachment. Actual love always considers the other's point of view and acts with regard for the highest and best in the other. Attachment only looks for self-gratification.

it is like fencing a duel with an imaginary opponent... better love and be loved than not love at all... sometimes, if not love at first sight, love begins from one...and then meets response... if there is no response for a 'considerable time' (depends on your sanity), then it is no more love... it is just fascination...madness... love has to be mutual to grow....

One sided love is no love at all and it is dangerous as you can become maniac and will permanently incapacitate you to realise the values of love as attribute for healthy living.Try to be trasparent,open ,understanding ,trusting and learning to love....

one sided love is not actually love, it is an infatuation, if the one loving is not being loved in return then its a very harsh thing that happens all day, everyday all over the world and i think it really sucks and is not cool because it can make people feel like crap. it has happened to me and took me way longer than it should have to break free from it and i feel for the ones currently in that situation, because it hurts and u must be strong... i mean i still love the girl, but I am just not letting him know and trying my hardest to move on...

ONE SIDED LOVE. Plz don't think me a cynic. One sided lovers r generally sick. They r timid, shy or irritating. Their love is always illusionary they live in dreams wasting their energy, time, contacts n most importantly LIFE. If one cannot turn his one sided love into two sided then better he stop, if not he will end up losing his self respect, concentration, friends finally himself.
Don't go by the filmy style of love, its confined to films only not to life. Ur life and people around you (family, friends) are more important than this bug. love is true but its perfect if and only it unites two.

Make it two way or break it mid way.

well, most of us have experienced this atleast once in their life time. One Sided Love is seriously very painful. So, its always better to cut it midway. But, I feel love just happens; nobody start loving someone by starting with #include love.h . You never know how it started... !!! So, One Sided Love can only be regarded as an unfortunate chapter in one's life and more sooner its closed, the better is for the person.

one year... countless thoughts

time and tide seriously don't wait for anyone... with the 2nd week of the 10th month of the year now going, I really find it difficult to figure out how the year 2007 passed off. However 2007 seems to be one of the most different year of my life. As I can rightly christen it as a year full of credits, losses, countless emotions, numerous sentiments and the list goes on. Sometime ago, I felt that I should not write my own stuffs in my blog, because blog is a place which is always exposed to the world. But the next moment I felt that the people around me are too busy to peep into my life through my blog. My blog has been a great friend of mine throughout this year, whom I approached when I was down or in the days of celebration. My blog is a good listener to me and so I love it the most. Year 2007 was the year when I spent the maximum amount of time in a solitary and lonesome mode. Never in my life, I could give so much of time just to myself. This year was professionally too good for me. I worked very hard in some months of the year and I got credited for that to my satisfaction. I also spent some of the nicest time with my friends. Two memorable events was the Goa trip in March and Alibaugh outing in September. But year 2007 was not always kind to me. I had to encounter some very depressing moments in this year. There were times when a sense of despair ruled my heart and soul in this year. Some posts in my blog rightly reflects those. Although those moments were extremely difficult to face on my part, but somehow everything was managed. I won't go into any more details about those worst mo of 2007. Everytime, I thought the Sun would shine tomorrow, but it rained. Nevertheless, I learnt a lot of things from those sucking times which may be helpful in living life in a better way in the future. Now as just only 2 months to go for another new year, I hope its fruitful to wait and watch the future. As someone rightly said, it can't rain all the time. The year 2007 was a year of countless thoughts for me. I saw and came across some real pictures of life... and also to some extent I tried discovering myself all through this year. Closing this post with the optimistic notion that not all who wander are lost...

weekend in Alibaugh

a cool weekend after many weeks. I along with my colleagues went to Alibaugh for a office sponsored trip. we started at around 9AM on Saturday morning. The journey was good, with lot of masti and fun in the bus. Reached there at around 1PM, checked into a resort already booked for us. After lunch, we went to Kihim Beach. I had some fun in the water but more fun with some beach dogs. Came back to our rooms by 8PM, and there was a DJ night arranged for us in the resort. Danced a lot to the tune of music. All my wild dances (I hardly know how to dance). Did a lot of prank in the dinner time and finally dozed off by midnight. Sunday morning, after breakfast we went to a nearby lake. I did a lot of peddle boating. It was real fun. The lake was deep and the water was awesome. One of my colleague, dived into the water and swimed. It must have been so fun for him ... I wish I could swim. The boating experience was ultimate. After lunch, we checked out from the resort and went to Kashid Beach. This is where I had my fun loaded time. One of my colleague took his car and we drove in the beach. The shore was wide with hard sand, so driving was not at all difficult. We could drive without the fear of the car getting stuck. I managed to drive at 100KM/Hr. It was only the sea-breeze which was a limiting factor. This was the 1st time ever, I drove in a sea-beach; a place where you can drive without getting annoyed by the traffic or pot-holes in the road. The return journey was also good, but I was sleeping in the bus all the time. All in all the trip was a fun filled one and I had a lot of good times. Looking forward to more such outings.

all these days...

Logged into blogger after so many days. After a lapse of around 2 months, I am again engaged into a priority 1 - severity 1 work, so back to the old days of hard work. Staying late in office, working in weekends. History repeats itself. I feel nice to work hard and stress myself. Only problem is that sometimes my minds get shut, I loose my commonsense when I feel that I am under tremendous work pressure. It was just yesterday, I was about to adopt a silly way to solve a problem. Had my friend did not come and rescue me at the right moment, I would have been toiling all night at office. I hope the work at hand will get over by end of this month. Otherwise life is going okay. Vitiligo sometimes bother me, but probably I have almost accepted it. Its my friend now, who will go along with me wherever I go. All in all life is going fine at its own pace.

Red Red Wine...

"Wine" a term usually related to celebration, good moments. How far can one travel to get wine? 1km... 10km... 100km... or 500km ??? Yes, me and my friend traveled 500km(to-fro) from Pune. It all started with a random plan that we decided to go to Sangli (a place 250kms away from Pune, known for its wine vineyard) to see the vineyards there and the processing plants. We started from Pune at around 2pm. The journey was through Mumbai-Bangalore Highway (NH4). It was raining moderately and hence it was real fun to drive. I myself don't drink wine, but it was all for the driving pleasure and to see the vineyard that I agreed upon the plan. I don't say myself to be a very good driver, but I find driving very much relaxing and soothing. We reached our destination at around 7pm. The place is known as Krishna Wine Park, and it comes under Maharashtra Industrial Development Corporation. The person there showed us the processing plant, the big chambers where the wines are stored and told us in brief about the varieties of grapes. It was really great to see and know those stuffs. We reached back home by around 12midnite. The drive, the vineyard ... proved a real cool combination and a memorable experience for both me and my friend.