Tuesday, December 29, 2009

A Letter from Mr. Algebra to Mrs. Trigonometry

The way I am writing blogs over the past few years, I used to write stuffs for the Children & Youth Corner section of The Sentinel during my school and 10+2 days. While, these days, most of my blog posts are my own, but those days I used compile stuffs and post it for publishing. I used to compile facts, quizzes, scientific articles and sometimes humor. It was in the 90's, the era before internet came in. So, any such information was worth for publishing. And, I used to wait every Sunday morning for my stuffs to get published. I still have those newspaper cuttings back home. During this time, when I was in 11th standard, somewhere I found a humorous article about A Letter from Mr. Algebra to Mrs. Trigonometry. I found the letter too funny and so posted in the Sunday section of the newspaper. As always, it was published and I was too glad. But, I was taken aback by something which got published in the same section of the newspaper, a fortnight later, I suppose. The article was named as Reply from Mrs. Trigonometry to Mr. Algebra. It was written by a girl of my academic year, studying in one of the most well known girls college in Shillong. I still remember her name, but won't mention it here to protect her privacy. She wrote an amazing reply to my letter, but ofcourse rejected my proposal for marriage of my son to her daughter [see my letter below]. I don't remember the exact wordings of her letter. but she wrote something like in the world of  mathematics, where AP, GP and HP rules our life, we don't have time for such things like love and marriage. The letter which I posted to the newspaper was an well known one, a google search can find it now. But, she wrote her own reply, so it was unique. Her reply caused a lot of itching in my head. A few weeks of rigorous hunting along with two of my college friends, I could manage to find another girl, who was the daughter of the landlord of my friend, and who studied in the same class as Mrs. Trigonometry. So, I sent her a note that, why not we meet up somewhere. Those days, I was very much scared of things like meeting a girl etc. so to avoid complications, my friend typed the note in his dad's electronic typewriter, so that my handwriting can't be identified. But, few days later, I got a note from Mrs. Trigonometry (through the other girl ofcourse). It was written "You are calling me as though a hit-man is calling his opponent for a fight." The girl seemed to be braver than me, she wrote it in her own handwriting and I should admit that her handwriting was very nice. That was the last I heard from her, neither I replied to her note. I was too much scared about anything related to girls those days and was a nerd also. But, I was told later, by all the third parties involved in this correspondence that she was pretty ;-).


Binomial House,
Divergent Street,

Calculus Street,
Mechanic Row,

My dear Trigonometry,

With due calculations I am asking your opinion about the marriage of my son, master Zero with your daughter, Miss Infinity. Mr.Statistic and Mr.Calculus are of an identical opinion. They say that their stats promise a happy combination. You know their love is unparalleled and any interception in their marriage plans would wreck havoc and disaster.

It is a proof that any digit upon zero is equal to infinity and any digit upon infinity is equal to zero . It is also true that neither of them possesses a weakness. My son Zero is a good and promising lad, who is emulated by many students in their examinations. He is a person of such immense will power that in spite of his multiplication and division he will yield only himself. As regards your daughter, Miss. Infinity, her beauty knows no ends. Intellectual gains have been baffled by her never ending beauty. I think the match will be a good one.

Will you please consult your formula and log tables for a suitable day for the ceremony? Please also do consult your esteemed sisters. Miss Solid geometry and Mrs.Co-ordinate Geometry.
Thanking you in anticipation.

Yours correctly,

P.S: I really don't know who is the original author of this letter, but I am thankful to him because what happened for this letter is really worth remembering.

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Sravan said...

I had no idea you were like this since childhood, whether it is w.r.t writing articles or w.r.t girls.

You must have tried tracking her down again? Send her another note?

P.S. Some day I wish to read those newspaper cuttings that you wrote.

saurav said...

@Sravan Sure.. may be next time I go home, I can bring those newspaper cuttings. I did some search with her name in Google.. but it was in vain :( since she was Mrs. Trigonometry, I still wonder who is her husband :D !!!

In search of something called LIFE said...


You mention she replied to your letter. Where is the reply man?

saurav said...

@In Search of Something called LIFE .. yeah the reply letter is still there in my home in Shillong, as a newspaper cutting. Hope google news archives "The Sentinel" someday and the reply should be available online :-)